Thursday, June 08, 2006

Millionaire Richard Quick, Esq. named "Most Artabilious & Shallow"


It was announced that the National Board of Human Excellence and esteemed blog Cafe Ambivalence has awarded its highest honor upon Millionaire Richard Quick, Esq., philanderopist and beloved wealth builder. At an online ceremony earlier today, National Board of Human Excellence President Dr. Severenz named the beloved Quick the "Most Artabilious and Shallow," its most coveted award.

Quick's publicist released a prepared statement stating that, while the Millionaire had no idea what "Artabilious," means, has never heard of the National Board of Human Excellence nor Cafe Ambivalence, and doesn't know if Dr. Severenz is a "real" doctor, he was very honored nonetheless to accept this honor on behalf of humanity and wealthy people everywhere.

This award brings the number of awards and honorary degrees bestowed upon Richard Quick, Esq. and his blog, Get Rich Quick, to one.

NOTE TO LITERATE VISITORS: Please see the Dr. Severenz' award speech by clicking here. If you can even remotely explain what he is saying, please post it as a comment below. Richard will reward you handsomely.


arevolutionofone said...

As much as I'd like to find someone with an opinion in common re: my nemesis, Richard Quick, I have to admit that I find Dr. Severenz's diatribe as incomprehensible as Mr. Quick does. While it is surprising to find someone with a blog who knows what a thesaurus is and knows how to use it (but seems at the same time mystified by the intricacies of a spell checker) there is such a thing as abuse of a good thing.

The purpose of a thesaurus, Dr. Severenz is to make your english clearer to its readers, not to turn it into Greek. Using a spell checker every now and again wouldn't hurt either.

-Stand up and fight the powers!

Dr. Severenz said...

A-revolution-o-fone, hello son. Your epithet is quite clever! I appreciate your comments and suggestions, thank you. Sometimes I get carried away, tend to get verbose. I often forget that simpletons will not understand advanced's sometimes difficult for me to 'connect' with the laypeople. Thank you!

I don't use a thesaurus, by the way. Don't need to.