Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Americans love their pets more than they love each other!

[Photo Credit: MoHDI]

Americans love their pets!

Did you know that 63% of all households have at least one pet? That's 69.1 million homes! And 43% have more than one pet!

43.5 million households have a doggy or two, followed by 37.7 million families with cats!

Americans spend BIG on their pets

For 2006, it estimated that Americans will spend $38.4 billion on Woofy and Tinkerbell! They'll spend $15.2 billion on food, $9.4 billion on Vet Care, $9.3 billion on supplies/OTC medicine, $1.8 billion on live animal purchases, and $2.7 billion on Grooming & Boarding.

Americans love their pets more than they love other Americans!
To truly understand the magnitude of the American love affair with Max, Sam, Lady, Bear & Smoky**, consider that 37 million Americans live in poverty. Americans could use the money they spend yearly on pets to transform every poor person in America into a multimillionaire*, but they choose, instead, to spend it on Shadow, Kitty, Molly, Buddy & Brandy***, which is cool with me. I'm as indifferent to the poor as the next guy (you). I'm just saying that some people might say that that money would be better spent on distributing Get Rich Quick! 99 Businesses you can start from the Hood DVD and audio programs to the poor, plus have one hell of a Korean BBQ (with Ginger, Baby, Misty, Missy, & Pepper**** as the guests of honor) that would unify us as a nation, and heal this rumored economic divide.

However, I do believe we have an obligation to use our vast Pet resources to help one beleaguered and neglected group that needs our help: The American Advertiser.

An Opportunity to Do (VERY) Well While Doing Good!
The American Advertiser has been trampled by TIVO, ravaged by the Remote and played for a chump by those who consciously ignore their product placements in tv shows and movies. They've done so much for you... now you can answer their cry for help AND get filthy rich in the process! That's right! You can build the moneymaking empire you've always dreamed of by seizing the untapped advertising potential of America's pet population, and meeting the demands of the American Advertiser.

Introducing the AdverPets Franchise Program!
QuickCo Enterprises' EnviroAd Division is pleased to announce the first joint venture franchise opportunity with its IdeaPartner MoHDI (Millions of Hundred Dollar Ideas)****: ADVERPETS.

Yes, the AdverPets franchise is your opportunity to join the glamorous gazillion-dollar advertising industry by matching up cash-rich advertisers with your own mammalian media network. Don't have business experience? Life experience? A clue? Don't worry! As long as you meet our EZ Qualification criteria, we'll provide the rest!

AdverPets. Selected by as a top franchise to "keep an eye on" for 2007!


Pet statistics courtesy APPMA.
Poor People statistics from Wikipedia.
* By investing $1000 per year, per poor person, in Millionaire Richard Quick's GET RICH QUICK! Wealth Building and Millionaire Mindset programs each would become a multi-millionaire... Guaranteed!
**The five most popular pet names
***The next five most popular pet names
****The next five most popular pet names
*****Pending notification and approval of MoHDI. This post in no way infers an endorsement, collusion or even awareness by MoHDI, which appears to be an actual and legitimate enterprise and therefore has little in common with QuickCo.


Gwen Hammond said...

You've got this one right, Richard.

There's a damn good reason why I named my toy poodle L-Ron. And I'll tell you something, people may think I'm crazy for spoiling him with cashmere sweaters and pearl leashes, but I find him much more deserving of my magnanimity than any one of my employees or any bum on the street claiming 'poverty.' First of all, he is very well groomed and his papers demonstrate his very old and regal bloodline. In fact, he loves the Cristal I put in his water bowl - a testament to his good breeding.

Kudos to you, dear. Keep calling them as you see them.

Gwen Hammond

Gwen Hammond said...

I came accross this wonderful quote just moments ago:

"If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man."- Mark Twain